tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29879583112138106132024-03-06T15:01:52.040-05:00On Loan From HeavenUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger295125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-19267166540825130152019-06-13T14:18:00.001-04:002019-06-13T14:24:02.814-04:00We all have a story to tell whether we whisper or yell....<br />
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<a href="http://www.charlotteparent.com/CLT/Telling-Your-Story-as-a-Parent-of-a-Special-Needs-Child/index.php?previewmode=on" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nXq2qtxGwIA/XQKRF33vgZI/AAAAAAAAT6w/w06MZ4FLd-EyFDiFIp7-ckjp-yCW5vUNgCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_6507%2B%25281%2529.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Hunter is 7. He was 2 pounds at birth and his story is a
complicated one, to say the least. But oh, it’s a good one! It’s a story full
of surprises and predictability… joy and fear… knowns and unknowns… and
miracles. So many miracles. We hear in the special needs community that our
child’s story isn’t ours to tell… that parts of their story should be private
or told only when and if our children decide to tell them. Maybe this is true…
but I’m starting to think that perhaps time has taught us otherwise as Hunter’s
parents. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Hunter somehow has the greatest joy amidst his 23 medical
specialists and multiple diagnoses that qualify him as ‘special needs’, however
I stand firm in my belief that his hatred for Target is in fact our greatest challenge…
one this Mama continues to build an arsenal of ‘survival techniques’ for on a
weekly basis!<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.charlotteparent.com/CLT/Telling-Your-Story-as-a-Parent-of-a-Special-Needs-Child/index.php?previewmode=on" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ibF_ghNZcPk/XQKRzBSFtpI/AAAAAAAAT7I/kAlb7E2ZXM8xb7t4NmU4D0WUV6AyyF2iQCLcBGAs/s320/IMG_5695%2B%25282%2529.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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I had such high hopes on that Tuesday morning! We had
successfully gotten through one doctor’s appointment and Hunter was his usual,
joyful self in the car. As I pulled into the parking lot I had my sights set on
that adrenaline filled power-walk through the Target Dollar Spot! We could do
this! Little did I know that today would be a ‘green calculator’ day and not a
‘red one’.<o:p></o:p></div>
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With the red calculator and the tiny hands of my 2 little boys
in my larger ones, we started our trek through the handicapped parking spots
and as I saw those bright red cement balls and double doors getting ready to
welcome me, Hunter stopped mid-stride…. his feet spread in his ‘combat stance’,
his body pulled back ever so slowly until our joined hands were stretched as
far as they could go, and my grip got tighter as he lowered all 50 pounds of
himself on to that brightly painted blue wheelchair on the parking lot pavement
before he let out his combat scream.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Hunter. Was. Ticked.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Now you must understand that our son is non-verbal in the
sense that he has limited words, however our son communicates extremely well.
And very loudly. As his ‘expressiveness’ grew louder on that warm pavement it
was my job to decipher why he was there in the first place. In our normal
routine, Abe and I closed in so we could give him space to express himself
safely. He yelled and carried on for about 274 minutes… ok ok, for 3 minutes
but if you’ve ever been ‘that mom’, standing on the blue wheelchair in the Target
parking lot, you know how long that 3 minutes feels! </div>
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As he threw the red
calculator across to the next spot in true ‘hopscotch’ fashion, he communicated
quite clearly that it wasn’t a ‘red day’. I took this time to calmly talk to my
non-verbal son about how we’d walk back to the car when he was finished and get
his green calculator, how I understood that he was frustrated but we needed to
get milk and bread and peanut butter and even some lollipops for a special
treat so we had to find a way to calm down and do our shopping.<o:p></o:p></div>
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All the while I was taking inventory of our surroundings
while trying desperately to push down the intense feelings of failure and
humiliation and even fear that I was feeling as I imagined what we looked like
to those who were observing our moment; the ambulance was parked out front,
meaning that our local paramedics were doing their daily and well-deserved
coffee run…. a sweet older couple was walking to their car…. a mom with a newborn
was headed inside…. a teenager was pulling in and I wondered why she wasn’t in
school… a woman who could be a grandma was talking on her phone in her car….<o:p></o:p></div>
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Hunter started to calm down so I helped him up, fixed the
hearing aid that had come loose, straightened his glasses, gave him a squeeze
to tell him I was proud of him, gave Abe a squeeze and told him I was proud of
him, too, took the hands of my 2 little boys once again, walked quickly back to
the car to get the green calculator, and headed into the store where we
bypassed the Dollar Spot and forgot to get the milk…. but we made it! On our
way out of the store about 472 minutes later… ok ok, about 13 minutes later…
that woman who could be a grandma stopped me at the double doors;<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Here it comes… ” I thought to myself.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“You did a great job, Mom. Those boys are so lucky that God
chose you to be their mom.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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The laundry list of what I could and should have done better
was already running through my head… it had been for over 16 minutes. Her words
soothed my anxious heart and gave me the nerve to walk across that blue painted
wheelchair one more time and get my boys home.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Here’s what I’ve learned; our son tells his own story well…
and your sweet thing probably does too! Whether it’s his hearing aids, her glasses,
a wheelchair, braces on his legs, a speech impediment, a turn of the head or
silly sounds they make, that swim diaper or life jacket at the pool on a child
who seems a little too old, the repetitive noises, or the tantrums on the blue painted
wheelchair, they are true story tellers. But the story they’re telling is a
hard one to tell without someone to fill in the blanks…. the details. It is so
tempting at times for me to push down the frustration I feel when I know
someone ‘just doesn’t get it’…. but then I have to ask myself if I’ve given
them a chance to.<o:p></o:p></div>
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A few weeks ago we ‘introduced’ our Hunter to our community
on social media. It was terrifying. But the truth is, Hunter is the best
story-teller… we’re just doing our best to build our arsenal of tools so we can
create a life for him that is safe, full, and understood. We’re filling in the
details of the story he is already telling.<o:p></o:p></div>
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You were chosen to be this precious child’s parent…. everyone
else was chosen to be their community. Come alongside your child and tell that
amazing story… let your Village in on the details. Give that “could- be grandma”
a chance to see that it’s just a green calculator day and not a red one…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>and give yourself and that sweet baby of
yours a chance to soak up the safety, encouragement, and understanding she has
to offer when she has just a few more details to go on. Those green calculator
days don’t feel so lonely when your community is in on the secret… and those red
calculator days are that much sweeter!<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.charlotteparent.com/CLT/Telling-Your-Story-as-a-Parent-of-a-Special-Needs-Child/index.php?previewmode=on" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="854" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FjDfWvWxpi0/XQKS9IO9gnI/AAAAAAAAT7c/F05tVuNdX-8PHh5Ixg8fniuexZCcxCoJACLcBGAs/s320/IMG_2580.JPG" width="213" /></a></div>
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Lindsay Smith is wife to Joey, Mama to 5 babies; 3
heartgrown through adoption, 1 homegrown through biology, and 1 waiting in Heaven. She is an advocate for special
needs parenting, open adoption, miscarriage, and every Mama … because we all
need just a little extra grace. "From His fullness we have all recieved grace upon grace." John 1:16. She writes and tells stories at <a href="http://www.facebook.com/OnLoanFromHeaven" target="_blank">On Loan FromHeaven on Facebook</a> and at <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/">www.OnLoanFromHeaven.com</a>
. <o:p></o:p></div>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-28351113826234712772019-06-06T16:26:00.001-04:002019-06-06T16:26:41.634-04:00We all share the same sun... but not the same sunset<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">I watched this man do his (seemingly super strange) ‘exercises’ for over an hour while we were at dinner one night last year in Florida. I've watched this video so many times since that trip and I've replayed our conversation in my head... He never stopped moving his arms, but once in a while he would let his hips in the action too.... he struck me as so funny at the time! </span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwZBAdlE5EK_A9dEYKqbWF6QpiqAE_syN4u1U7QJnGVrdUOAnuOgbLBDJKfTDfEnrkX1sJoqqTuj-97C8SFeQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">After dinner, Joey got the check and I walked across the street to get a photo of the killer sunset before it was gone (it was incredible!!!!) and he said ‘hi’ so I said ‘hi’ back.... and it hit me that I had watched this man do over an hour of more ‘exercise’ than I had done (or am now allowed to do) in weeks and so I told him so! </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">His reply stopped me in my tracks- </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">“I drove an hour to get here, to this spot... to watch this sunset. It’s the best one around even though we all share the same sunset- it does matter where you are and where you look.’ </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Ugh. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">So I said.... ‘you seem insightful so I’m going to ask you- why these motions? Why this place? Why the sunset?’ </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">His reply- </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">‘I had a massive heart attack not long ago- I’m not supposed to be here. At this place. Right now. My doctor gave me movements to do and told me to do them in a place that makes me happy, so here I am- it may be a drive but I’m alive and I’m moving and I’m happy! I don’t know if I’ll make it to tomorrow so I’ll do 20 more than my count tonight for good measure.’ </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">I asked him if he knew Jesus. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">He said ‘I’m here, aren’t I?’ </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">And he smiled at me in the moonlight. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">I told him he was a blessing to me- I told him that I’m learning so much about life right now and that I’m thankful for his- I’m thankful I met him. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">He said ‘I’ll be praying for you- for many sunsets to come.’ </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Guys- we don’t know people’s stories unless we ask but man, it’s so easy to judge. I sure did. He looked like a beach loon! </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">But also- none of us should be here. He taught me so much- SEE people, value them, count your every movement... and do a few more than you're supposed to... listen to the people who love you, go where you’ll be happy, and never be afraid to be you- even if you look like a loon. Live. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">God gave you this life. Live it for Him and you will truly live.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: , "blinkmacsystemfont" , "segoe ui" , "roboto" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">It took me a year to be able to reformat, load and share this video with you... I'm trusting in His timing; for both of us!</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-32218236185631566472018-10-29T21:03:00.000-04:002019-06-06T16:26:56.511-04:00URGENT- Baby Boy Needs Family By FRIDAY!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement and this is NOT the same baby that was posted by Spence Chapin... I have done my best to start this research for you and have linked to all pertinent information within this post. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for him. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.<br />
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<span style="font-family: "times";"><b>A precious baby boy's First Family is desperately searching for his forever family! Baby Boy was born recently and he has been diagnosed with <a href="https://www.pwsausa.org/about-pws/" target="_blank">Prader Willi Syndrome</a>. Baby Boy will be released from the hospital FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2018 and NEEDS HIS FOREVER FAMILY TO BE THERE TO TAKE PLACEMENT OF HIM! </b></span><br />
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A few things to consider before requesting further information about Baby Boy;<br />
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<b><br /></b><b>* Family MUST BE HOME STUDY READY</b><br />
<b>* Family MUST BE READY TO TRAVEL</b><br />
<b>* Family MUST BE OPEN TO SOME LEVEL OF COMMUNICATION WITH BABY BOY'S FIRST FAMILY AS HE GROWS</b><br />
<b>* Baby Boy will qualify for adoption assistance</b><br />
<b>* He is located on the East Coast</b><br />
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YOU, my friends have found DOZENS of families for precious babies right here at On Loan From Heaven.... and 2 of them had Prader Willi Syndrome. Those precious little ones are growing and thriving and we are SO thankful for your determination and faithfulness in sharing their stories!<br />
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<b>If YOU believe you could be Baby Boy's Forever Family and you fit the above criteria, please email ...</b><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><b>sara@specialangelsadoption.org</b></span><br />
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If you are not in a place to bring this boy into your home, I NEED YOUR HELP!!</div>
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Click 'SHARE'. </div>
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Your share could be the one that finds it's way to the eyes and hearts of this baby's family.</div>
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YOU are His hands and feet. He is faithful when we have faith in His plan.</div>
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I can't thank you enough.... and I can't wait to share with you when this baby boy is HOME!!!</div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-53860631363768313492018-10-23T15:55:00.003-04:002018-10-23T16:22:24.370-04:00So I lost a baby. Please... just call me Mom.<div class="h_s81772jq3 x_s81778ab8 clearfix" style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; margin-bottom: -1px; zoom: 1;">
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Losing a baby- in any way, whether it be via the devastating realization of infertility, a terrifying miscarriage, a painful still birth or child loss, or a heartbreaking changed adoption plan changes a person.</div>
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I have yet to talk to a Mama who struggled through the challenges of infertility who doesn’t wonder if she ever lost a baby. In a true and honest conversation, almost every woman wonders if ‘medicine missed it’ or if ‘God was trying to protect her’ .... but she wonders if she’ll walk through Heaven’s gates and be greeted by a baby she never knew she was missing. My own Mama and I have had this same conversation many times. How many women are haunted by this question that simply cannot be answered this side of Heaven? She wonders ‘why me?!’ Her body has failed her.... has failed her husband. She has failed her husband. Surely she has done something so horrible in her past to ‘deserve this.’ Surely God loves ‘her’ more than He loves me. So we cry out to Jesus ... and it changes us.</div>
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Losing a baby- at any stage in pregnancy or delivery or life changes the very makeup of our existence. Who we are, how we are built, how we think, and even holds the potential to change what we believe. Does it matter if life is lost in the warmth and should-be safety of a Mama’s belly ..... or within reach of her strong and should-be safe arms? Both are loving... both are intrinsically desperate to protect and nurture the life that has been entrusted to her, yet somehow that isn’t the plan. Regardless of the details and circumstances, lives lost under the seemingly carefully watchful eye of a Mama lead to Mamas who feel like they failed their babies. Their body failed, their arms failed, they failed their calling.... they are unworthy. So we cry out to Jesus... we struggle to find our worth, which we are truly only able to find in Him.... but still, He seems so far away sometimes.... and we are changed.</div>
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A changed adoption plan ‘seems trivial’, some may say. A changed adoption plan is a change in plans- just like any other family planning. For some, it is the very life vest that was thrown at the exact time to save a Mama’s hope and renew her spirit. The plan that God used to MAKE her a Mama: to let her know she hasn’t been forgotten- that her baby will come. To some it is the vessel He uses to forge a new path- to change direction for a family that isn’t clear: to confirm or deny ‘open or closed’ or ‘here or there’ or ‘one or more’. A changed adoption plan always symbolizes a Mama becoming a Mama.... but maybe not the Mama who thought it would be her. Her turn. It’s never bad.... it just doesn’t make sense. And so this Mama cries out to Jesus and asks ‘why?!?’ but in yet a different tone- and she, too crawls in His lap and trusts in His complicated and seemingly nonsensical plan.... and she is changed.</div>
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Infertility..... miscarriage.... still birth.... infant loss.... child loss. We are changed. We will never be the same.</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>“I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born!”</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>Isaiah 66:9</b></i></span></div>
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Isn’t that His point?</div>
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The pain of <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2013/08/such-bitter-sweetness-announcement.html" target="_blank">losing our #3</a> is still fresh- our infertility journey still haunts me. I birthed a healthy baby and I still call myself infertile .... by the way, we have at least 5 babies now; 4 here with us and at least 1 in Heaven (more, of you ask me, but I don’t have proof so.....). Am I grateful? Of course. Beyond. I’m blown away by His mercy and grace and by the goodness of His plan! I’m thankful for the things I didn’t see! But yet- I still wonder what parts of that journey changed me.... changed my marriage. Sometimes it’s a distant numbness and ache and sometimes it comes crashing over me and I can’t possibly see it coming. It’s a memory or a scent ... something someone says or does. I don’t have a photo with all my babies in it. Some days, that reality is sheer torture.</div>
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I know you hurt, Mama. I do, too. I don’t think it ever goes away. But what has been born from that pain? Have you seen it?! You have to let yourself see.... you have to let Him show you!</div>
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Do NOT let that pain be for nothing, precious friend! Do not waste the story He wrote for you while you wait for your turn to meet that baby .... don’t you dare let wasted time be part of the story you tell him or her!</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>“No, in all these things we are MORE than conquerors through Him who loved us!”</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>Romans 8:37</b></i></span></div>
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Conquer this part of your story. Conquer this part of the story of your marriage ... of your other babies.... of your future children.... don’t waste it. it all starts with you! It isn’t the same without him... or her... or them.</div>
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It’s not lost on me that sometimes, in the quiet and still... in the dark, in the car, in the shower.... this is so so hard to hold on to. I know. Our worth here on this side of Heaven is so hard to find and trust and believe.... even when we know in our hearts that HE loves us enough... those lies dig deep.</div>
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I know. So hear me, friend. I know. Sometimes we just need to know that someone knows.</div>
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What do we have in common? We’re all Mamas. We all hurt. We’ve all been given this incredible charge- we are loved, we are called to love, and we are called to pass that love on.</div>
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We are changed.... because of that love.</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>“We love because He first loved us.”</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><b>1 John 4:19</b></i></span></div>
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You are loved. And your baby is not forgotten.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-37976432271927525512017-08-10T22:12:00.001-04:002017-08-10T22:17:13.927-04:00ONFH Babies!<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><i>On Loan From Heaven and all of our readers have been entrusted with the incredible honor of finding families for dozens of special babies over the years.... AND we have found a family for EVERY SINGLE ONE!!! It is our honor and privilege to watch these babies grow and see the dreams their First Mama's had for them being fulfilled through the faith of our readers and theses babies' Forever Families! </i></b></div>
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<b><i>It is an honor to introduce you to On Loan From Heaven's most precious babies!!!</i></b></div>
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<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/08/baby-wyatt.html" target="_blank"><b>BABY W</b></a></div>
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Sweet Baby Wyatt's family got to him as quickly as they could upon learning that they were HIS FOREVER FAMILY!! This precious boy has thrived with the support and love from his brothers, sisters, and Mommy and Daddy and is reaching far beyond what was 'expected' of him not long ago. Please visit Wyatt's mommy's<a href="https://1108721.myubam.com/" target="_blank"> Usborne Books Page</a> to see how you can support them as they navigate his medical needs and the continued growth of their family! </div>
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<a href="https://1108721.myubam.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="325" data-original-width="280" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VOzdQ7An5bE/WYzh1TXaz4I/AAAAAAAACiY/4XuFZk96GDkyhrA8AqDtODkK8tej9YS0QCLcBGAs/s320/20624374_10154781923231961_692162775_n.jpg" width="275" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/baby-z.html" target="_blank">Baby Z</a></div>
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Baby Z's story will have to speak for itself.... please please read his amazing miracle-story<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/baby-z.html" target="_blank"> here</a>. This sweet little fighter became a piece of my (Lindsay's) heart and his Mommy quickly stole another small part! It was a joy to walk through this season with such a precious boy and his family! Please visit Baby Z's Mommy's page to watch him grow<a href="https://www.facebook.com/anitacmiron/" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/anitacmiron/</a>!</div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/anitacmiron/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="890" data-original-width="960" height="296" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-hJPskomUEZQ/WYzjaNWFwvI/AAAAAAAACik/Z3YTxMGJIDk1AbM08g_dYLEY4FHW0q4YQCLcBGAs/s320/20046681_878374405644417_7935307403747869150_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/08/urgent-baby-boys-needs-family-asap.html" target="_blank">AZ Baby</a></div>
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Sweet Baby 'AZ' was diagnosed with Down Syndrome at birth and when we <a href="http://az%20baby%20%20sweet%20baby%20%27az%27%20was%20diagnosed%20with%20down%20syndrome%20at%20birth%20and%20when%20we%20set%20out%20to%20find%20his%20forever%20family%2C%20you%20did%20not%20disappoint%21%21%21%20sweet%20corbin%27s%20forever%20family%20was%20by%20his%20side%20within%2024%20hours%20and%20while%20they%20are%20absolutely%20smitten%2C%20he%20has%20proven%20that%20health%20only%20grows%20with%20love.%20while%20still%20tiny%2C%20this%20fighter%20is%20growing%20leaps%20and%20bounds%21/" target="_blank">set out to find his Forever Family</a>, YOU did not disappoint!!! Sweet Corbin's Forever Family was by his side within 24 hours and while they are absolutely smitten, HE has proven that health only grows with love. While still tiny, this fighter is growing leaps and bounds! </div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/eaglelodgeisadopting/?hc_ref=ARSfl-dkHPMma0JZ-CC3IgpDiATZVouA9jxWcm8gdScn-05rTGasiw8pNpPOCTFbnUY&fref=nf&pnref=story" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WHV2WuVNSoQ/WY0FjtBmYXI/AAAAAAAACi4/8zM9rWnrdnojwStKSRGfZNnh2FKokEpwQCLcBGAs/s320/20751247_10103574086025117_1318168975_n.jpg" width="240" /></a><a href="https://www.facebook.com/eaglelodgeisadopting/?hc_ref=ARSfl-dkHPMma0JZ-CC3IgpDiATZVouA9jxWcm8gdScn-05rTGasiw8pNpPOCTFbnUY&fref=nf&pnref=story" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-szKdxl7AZ2k/WY0FhNAA_OI/AAAAAAAACi0/yrIyd-Nk4MckCgqWqY7Ei2ZGsxJelUvbgCLcBGAs/s320/20786474_10103574070740747_794414812_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<b>*** If your family has grown through a post on our page, please email OnLoanFromHeaven@yahoo.com ! We'd love to feature you and any page you'd like us to support! **</b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-39871376438447209412017-08-10T18:39:00.000-04:002017-08-10T18:39:11.006-04:00Baby Wyatt<div style="font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 6px; text-align: center;">
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YOU FOUND HIS FAMILY!!!! Baby W is HOME!!!!!</div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-30996854601442661792017-08-07T16:42:00.002-04:002017-08-08T12:56:02.523-04:00URGENT- BABY BOYS NEEDS A FAMILY ASAP!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.coloresadoptions.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="285" data-original-width="1600" height="112" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibJmrnjAHq7-MXkJS2BgiZkPwFEu6OQDQvL6xqenG5cC6kjnhldzCcOST5xMVCX58z_NHhr955CI5LUCfJgdeq_aKC_sWYFVU_4Mxyerg3IC6GOb7xcLXA6ejLPRImItN7OREad5Z17CxW/s640/colores+adoptions+LOGO-1+border.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: 21.3333px;"><b><u>UPDATE;</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 21.3333px;"><b><u>We have recieved over 40 Home Studies and emails from families who are desperate to get their hands on the sweet boy we posted about last night.... FORTY!!!!!</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 21.3333px;"><b><u>You guys. GOD IS SO GOOD!!!! YOU are also so good!</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 21.3333px;"><b><u>Please give me some time to sort through these emails in order to see if we have his Forever Family somewhere within those 40 emails.... I will either refresh the post or post an update when his family has been found!</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 21.3333px;"><b><u>THANK YOU!!!!!!!!</u></b></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-69284959813818298962017-08-03T16:19:00.001-04:002017-08-03T17:28:10.254-04:00URGENT- BABY NEEDS A FAMILY BY MONDAY!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<b>**PLEASE PLEASE SHARE**</b></div>
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<b>IF THIS BABY DOES NOT HAVE A FOREVER FAMILY BY MONDAY, AUGUST 7, 2017, HE WILL BE PLACED IN STATE CARE. </b></div>
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<b>DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN!!!!</b></div>
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Boy's needs are extensive and much is unknown; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about him. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel <u>quickly</u>, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for him. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">A special family is desperately needed BY MONDAY, AUGUST 7, 2017 for a 4 week old baby boy that suffered a brain bleed in utero. Part of his brain was without oxygen before they could deliver him and his official diagnosis is <a href="http://www.birthinjuryguide.org/birth-injury/types/hypoxic-ischemic-encephalopathy-hie/" target="_blank">HIE (Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy)</a>. This sweet boy also has a heart condition that will require surgery when he is 6 months to a year old. Due to his brain injury his future is unknown..... he may not walk or talk and he may be blind or deaf. </span></b><b><span style="font-family: "times";">Baby Boy's First Mama wants a closed adoption but would like to find a family who will do everything they can do help this sweet boy reach his fullest potential.</span></b><br />
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<b><br /></b><b>* Family MUST BE HOME STUDY READY</b><br />
<b>* Family MUST BE READY TO TRAVEL</b><br />
<b>* Baby Boy is located in Texas</b><br />
<b>* Family CANNOT be located in NY</b><br />
<b>* Reps for Baby Boy will assist Forever Family in applying for SSI and Adoption Subsidies</b><br />
* <b>Fees are $12,000 and do not include finalization, travel, or post placement visits</b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">This precious baby boy is in need of lifelong care, a family who will devote themselves to helping him reach his very highest potential, and who believe with everything in them that he does, in fact have enormous potential. Because he does.</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">Here's the thing, friends..... while the SCARIEST part of his story is all of the tremendous 'unknown'....this is also the very BEST part of his story!!! 'Unknown' leaves room for SO MUCH POTENTIAL! And this is when God shows up the biggest and best and most on behalf of His precious babies!</span></b><br />
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<b>If you would like to know more about bringing this precious boy into your family, please email your home study to Sara@SpecialAngelsAdoption.org .</b></div>
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<b>If this sweet boy isn't the right fit for your family right now, <u>PLEASE click 'share'</u> so we can continue searching for his forever family! They're out there... and I so strongly believe that we will find them! We are running out of time and I know how you guys work... if anyone can find this baby's family, it's YOU! </b></div>
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<b>Thank you for being HIS hands and feet on behalf of this most precious creation!</b><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com38tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-9586805815742058222017-07-27T14:25:00.002-04:002017-08-03T16:39:02.035-04:00URGENT- Special Needs Baby Boy Needs His Forever Family!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<b>UPDATE- BABY BOY IS WITH HIS FOREVER FAMILY!!! YOU DID IT!!!!</b></div>
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<b>**PLEASE PLEASE SHARE**</b></div>
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Boy's needs are extensive and much is unknown; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about him. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for him. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">A special family LOCATED IN THE NORTHEAST is desperately needed for a 6 week old baby boy that was born with <a href="http://www.babymed.com/fetal-malformations/hydrocephaly" target="_blank">Hydrocephaly </a>and with additional complications that could result in <a href="http://www.babymed.com/fetal-malformations/hydrocephaly" target="_blank">Cerebral Palsy</a>. This is a private adoption and Baby Boy's First Mama would like to find a family who will agree to an open adoption with visits.</span></b><br />
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<b><br /></b><b>* Family MUST BE HOME STUDY READY</b><br />
<b>* Family MUST BE READY TO TRAVEL</b><br />
<b>* Family must be in a Northeast state, as required by Baby Boy's First Mama</b><br />
<b>* Family CANNOT be located in NY, NJ, or Delaware</b><br />
* <b>Fees are $14,000 and do not include finalization, travel, or post placement visits</b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">This precious baby boy is in need of lifelong care, a family who will devote themselves to helping him reach his very highest potential, and who believe with everything in them that he does, in fact have enormous potential. Because he does.</span></b><br />
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<b>Fees are<u> $14,000 </u>and have already been reduced as much as possible. Fees do not include finalization in the adoptive parent's home state or travel and travel expenses.</b></div>
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<b>If you would like to know more about bringing this precious boy into your family, please email your home study to Sara@SpecialAngelsAdoption.org .</b></div>
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<b>If this sweet boy isn't the right fit for your family right now, PLEASE click 'share' so we can continue searching for his forever family! They're out there... and I so strongly believe that we will find them! We are running out of time and I know how you guys work... if anyone can find this baby's family, it's YOU! </b></div>
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<b>Thank you for being HIS hands and feet on behalf of this most precious creation!</b><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-35442084042077958342017-06-12T21:52:00.001-04:002017-06-12T21:52:04.500-04:00Baby Z <div style="text-align: center;">
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I spent the first 4 weeks of <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/urgent-baby-z-needs-family.html" target="_blank">Baby Z'</a>s life with him... I witnessed his first breath as I wiped down his precious First Mama's forehead with a cold washcloth while she so bravely pushed... I witnessed her very last moments with the life she had so lovingly sustained within her.<br />
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I snuggled him daily, I bonded with his nurses and doctors while we all did our best to get to know a seemingly-complicated little guy who was changing our lives without us even knowing... I cried out to Jesus to help me find his family. I prayed for his First Mama who's heart was broken ...I prayed that she would find peace in the life-changing and life-giving decision she made for her son...<br />
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I prayed that I would live up to the profound responsibility she entrusted to me.<br />
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I prayed for his Forever Family, wherever they were. I knew Jesus was preparing their hearts for this precious miracle... I prayed that the magnitude of the story of his life would be evident to them... I prayed that they would take comfort in knowing that he was loved from day 1... that he never went a single second without a family...<br />
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In fact, his family grew daily as myself, <a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank">Ms. Allison</a> and Mrs. Dana took turns spending time with this precious life... as we did our best to pour love into him... not realizing that HE was the one changing US with every second that passed by.<br />
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Baby Boy's First Mama made a beautiful plan for his life and his arrival was anticipated by so many! God took a little time to reveal the intricate details of His plan for this little boy and so we patiently waited, honored to be his official snugglers until it was time to tell the world the story of one of God's most precious creations....<br />
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about a little boy who we lovingly named 'Baby Z'.<br />
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We <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/urgent-baby-z-needs-family.html" target="_blank">shared Baby Z's story with you</a> on June 2, 2017 and asked you for a few simple favors...<br />
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Read. Pray. Share.<br />
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<a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1201" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-asK5o7kqEl0/WT823M_EXGI/AAAAAAAACgI/piObuWWnqsgKsNFRH9afWFQcrRx5oEjUACLcB/s320/Miron_logo_7.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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But let's take it back a few days to May 24, 2017 when <a href="https://www.facebook.com/fitwithanita" target="_blank">Anita Miron</a> posted a viral photo of her, her sweet girl Scarlett, and her precious son Jack on Facebook. The Miron family lost their son at 32 weeks on May 24, 2016. Shortly after losing Jack, the Mirons lost their second sweet boy, William at 20 weeks. Their open hearts, passion for special needs, and decision to grow their family through adoption while carrying on the legacy of their 2 boys caught the attention of ABC <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/heartbreaking-reason-mom-shared-photo-baby-died-birth/story?id=47775704" target="_blank">who posted their story</a> on June 2, 2017.<br />
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/fitwithanita" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="701" data-original-width="526" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijA8EoNflHkehDUC5KJSB93-QDMU4xUReL49CsiNJhHAljsRihbJsK0t9deTQCMFu1f3lKtr4EivQRRYqpivg1iYq91hoGi1o9BdVQY55bBxuXE3ZgqtLj7vEutTZ8It4U0YpOYuaKyk0C/s320/18671288_10212989643597266_2845585831912517205_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Baby Z's First Mama entrusted her future and the future of her son to <a href="http://www.coloresadoptions.com/" target="_blank">Colores Adoptions</a>. My role as Family Services Manager for <a href="http://www.coloresadoptions.com/" target="_blank">Colores Adoptions </a>and the influence YOU all have when you share these special babies on this blog joined forces on June 2, 2017 when Baby Z's story went live in your hearts and computers.<br />
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10,000 shares. 350,000 views. 72 inquiries to date.<br />
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But that first one.<br />
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That first email;<br />
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<b id="yui_3_16_0_1_1497305989837_24085" style="-webkit-padding-start: 0px; background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, "Lucida Grande", sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-align: start;"><i>"In a nutshell we have lost two babies in utero. Both were lost by a chord accident. Our first who we lost at 32 weeks had Down syndrome. We had prepared ourselves for him. We had opened our hearts to special needs. We were ready. So we have decided to extend that love to someone who needs it. ~ Anita"</i></b><br />
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Anita woke up on June 2, 2017 to a frantic message from her sweet friend, Cate who shared with her Ms. Allison's post about Baby Z that linked back here to his story...<br />
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Isn't that just like our God?!<br />
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A moment to read... a heartfelt prayer... a simple share.<br />
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You, my precious friends once again faithfully and obediently allowed yourselves to be used in one of the most profound and miraculous stories that Jesus has ever written.<br />
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It is my greatest joy and honor to introduce you to Baby Z... now and forever named Baby Warren Miron.<br />
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He is a life-changer. He is a world-changer. He has forever changed me.<br />
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His Forever Family is blessed beyond measure.<br />
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<a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1066" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fJEhsMrOKcE/WT8-w9OCYhI/AAAAAAAACgk/wPPLKjGaSGIYzBnlK54huXtvSMvzUqHGQCLcB/s320/Miron_logo_5.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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"He predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will."<br />
Ephesians 1:5<br />
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<a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1065" data-original-width="1600" height="212" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-6TcY93NHHS4/WT8-zn4Wi2I/AAAAAAAACgs/VkTlrUj4zd4rdqfncgkq-wObFKgVTTCywCLcB/s320/Miron_logo_4.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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"And whoever welcomes one such child in my name also welcomes me."</div>
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Matthews 18:5</div>
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<a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1065" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4D3HT-YR6ug/WT9BK9CG_mI/AAAAAAAACg8/WebDbK-rWOcQAbItjPAsmTDbLCGx_Gk8gCLcB/s320/Miron_logo_3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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"For you created my inmost being; your knitted me together in my mother's womb."<br />
Psalm 139:13<br />
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<a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1065" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-F2MJMYWHHXY/WT9DdVk9LMI/AAAAAAAAChI/_TP3AJrW2TIWeUENXlhWzskhSbctymsQACLcB/s320/Miron_logo_1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made!"</div>
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Psalm 139:14</div>
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Dozens of inquiries have been received from families who are genuinely ready to welcome a special needs baby into their hearts and home. It has proven to be a huge and difficult task to respond to each inquiry, however all home studies and contact information has been saved for future special needs babies who need a family. If you or someone you know are home study approved, please email BabyZ2017@yahoo.com and we will include you in our new special needs database.<br />
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If you are an expecting mama who is considering if adoption could be the right choice for you and your baby, please email OnLoanFromHeaven@yahoo.com<br />
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<b>Baby Z's representing adoption agency</b>; <a href="http://www.coloresadoptions.com/" target="_blank">Colores Adoptions</a><br />
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<b>Baby Z's North Carolina attorney;</b> <a href="http://misockylaw.com/" target="_blank">The Micosky Law Group</a><br />
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<b>On Loan From Heaven</b> <a href="http://www.facebook.com/onloanfromheaven" target="_blank">Facebook page</a><br />
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<b>Photo Credit</b>; <a href="http://www.allisonfowler.com/" target="_blank">Allison Fowler Photography</a><br />
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<b>Anita Miron's <a href="https://www.facebook.com/fitwithanita" target="_blank">Facebook Page</a></b><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-9664400228115806532017-06-01T21:17:00.001-04:002017-06-12T22:28:04.556-04:00URGENT- Baby Z Needs A Family<div style="font-family: times; margin: 0px; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/baby-z.html" target="_blank">UPDATE; PLEASE CLICK AND READ</a></u></b></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2017/06/baby-z.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1201" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BxUOHNwVYP0/WT9NpUKy8YI/AAAAAAAAChY/mTfkUhCIot0RO3BSeHdjAj1lpP9AzjtZgCLcB/s320/Miron_logo_7.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Baby Z</u></b></span><br />
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* This is a <b>SPECIAL NEEDS</b> placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have linked to most pertinent information within this post, however Baby Boy's needs are extensive and much will remain unknown until he is older and has a chance to 'prove' himself; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about him. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)<br />
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* If you do not have a <b>CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY</b>, and are <b>NOT</b> ready to travel quickly, <b>DO NOT INQUIRE</b> about this situation.<br />
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* I will filter all inquiries about Baby Z. If your<b> INITIAL EMAIL </b>does <b>NOT </b>include your attached, valid, and special needs-approved Home Study AND a PDF of your profile, your email will <b>NOT </b>be returned. Current and redacted records for Baby Z will be available to any email containing all of the requested information... it will be the responsibility of the Home Study approved family to consult with practitioners and specialists regarding information contained in Baby Z's records. Specific information about Baby Z's location, name, or photos will not be shared until his FOREVER FAMILY is in place from a legal standpoint.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>Got it?!? Good. </u></b></span><br />
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NOW... let me introduce you to a little man who has my entire heart. He is already a life-changer... a world-changer.<br />
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All of the following information is based on Baby Z's medical records provided to us by his physicians;<br />
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* Based on the information we have, Baby Z was a full-term 38 week Hispanic male baby who is now 3 weeks old and is in North Carolina. He was 5 pounds 11 ounces at birth and has gained about 2 pounds since birth.<br />
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* Baby Z's initial apgar scores were 7 & 9.<br />
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* Baby Z exhibited poor feeding skills (poor suck) and dysmorphic features (low-set ears, wide spaced eyes, flattened nasal bridge, rocker bottom feet), which led his Care Team to transfer him from the infant nursery to the NICU.<br />
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* A second examination of Baby Z's physical features was performed at 4 days old and the practitioner noted no dysmorphic features other than slightly posteriorly located but normally formed ears and slight rocker bottom feet.<br />
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* A full Macro Genetic panel was completed after birth and all Macro results were NORMAL for a typical XY male. Micro Genetic testing was also done <u>and those results are still pending. These could take another 3 weeks to arrive and he will need a family before then.</u><br />
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* An MRI of Baby Z's brain was done at 3 days old and showed an <a href="https://www.ninds.nih.gov/Disorders/All-Disorders/Absence-Septum-Pellucidum-Information-Page" target="_blank">Absent Septum Pellucidum</a>, <a href="http://nodcc.org/corpus-callosum-disorders/faq/" target="_blank">Hypoplastic Corpus Callosum</a>, <a href="https://rarediseases.org/rare-diseases/neuropathy-congenital-hypomyelination/" target="_blank">Hypomyelination</a>, and a premature-looking Cortical Brain Convolution. The Cerebellum looked small and there is a cyctic dilation of the posterior fossa with a possible <a href="https://radiopaedia.org/articles/isolated-inferior-vermian-hypoplasia" target="_blank">vermis hypoplasia</a>, and small volume intraventricular hemorrhage without hydrocephalus. Baby Z's radiologist noted that the abnormalities in his MRI indicate possible neurological complications, including seizures, learning disabilities, speech delays, and feeding challenges. A follow-up brain MRI will be suggested at 6 months of age to gauge the growth of the brain and confirm original results or determine any changes.<br />
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* So far, his heart ultra-sound showed a healthy heart.<br />
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* A Physical Therapy consult showed age-appropriate reflexes.<br />
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* So far, his ophthalmology consult as well as the brain MRI showed a healthy optic nerve, indicating healthy vision.<br />
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* After working with Speech/ Feeding Therapists and his GI doctor, Baby Z's team decided that it would be most beneficial for Baby Z to have a temporary PEG Gastronomy Tube so he could move forward and find his Forever Family outside of the hospital setting. This tube was recently placed in hopes that Baby Z's family will find him soon and be able to take him home quickly where they can work diligently with him and his therapists on his feeding so his mouth muscles get stronger and the tube can be removed.<br />
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* MUCH of Baby Z's future is unknown... not unlike any of ours. He will need as much love and attention as any child and he will surely thrive with a family who is dedicated to helping him reach his potential. This little guy will show us who he is as he grows and his family will need to say YES to loving him regardless of those unknowns.<br />
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* <b>Fees;</b> $21,000 (these fees include agency fees and NC attorney fees. They do not include post placement visits in the families home state or finalization)<br />
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* Baby Z's First Mom had a very specific plan in place for her son. She is determined to see him with a family who can provide for him, invest in him, and love him as he grows! She does not want contact with Baby Z's Forever Family, at this time but has asked for us to inform her when he is settled in his forever family.<br />
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<b>FOR INTERESTED AND QUALIFIED FAMILIES; A PDF of a state approved Home Study and a PDF of a potential Adoptive Families profile should be emailed to <u>babyz2017@yahoo.com </u>. Your initial email should include a PDF of your special needs approved Home Study and a PDF of your adoption profile as well as the following information;</b><br />
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<b>* Names</b><br />
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<b>* Primary contact info, including email address, home address, and phone numbers</b><br />
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<b>* Date Home Study Expires</b><br />
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<b>* Reasons for considering a special needs placement</b><br />
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<b> Any email received that does not contain all of the above WILL NOT BE RESPONDED TO. Any qualified email will be responded to; response will include a redacted copy of Baby Z's records for your practitioner and/or specialist's review. The hospital has expressed that Baby Z will be ready for discharge within 2 weeks (if not sooner) and a family should be prepared to give their full YES and be ready to travel within that time period upon agency and attorney approval. </b><br />
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In short; This sweet little man is a Leap of Faith, as many of our precious babies have been. We've managed to unite them ALL with their Forever Families and I know we can do it again.<br />
If you believe you could be the family this sweet little man has been waiting for, please email <u>babyz2017@yahoo.com</u> as soon as possible with all required information!<br />
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And if not... you will do him a enormous favor by simply clicking 'share'... as many times as it takes. And pray. Please pray for this precious life. I know firsthand that these sweet babies... some of God's more precious creations... grow and change and prove themselves best when they're nurtured and loved the way God nurtures and loves all of us. YOU can be that person who leads him to his FOREVER.<br />
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Consider... Pray... Share.<br />
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That's it.<br />
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Let's change some lives, friends.<br />
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<b>* This is a placement through <a href="http://www.coloresadoptions.com/" target="_blank">Colores Adoption</a>s; a licensed agency that Baby Z's First Mama trusted to help her fulfill her wishes for her baby boy. If you or someone you know is considering adoption for a child or wanting to know more about growing a family through adoption, please email info@coloresadoptions.com * </b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-79046825035112903222017-03-09T16:35:00.004-05:002017-03-21T11:56:58.234-04:00FAMILY NEEDED ASAP- Special Needs Baby Boy<div style="font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; text-align: center;">
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UPDATE on Baby W;</div>
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Baby W's post has gone VIRAL with over 75,000 views as well as over 12.000 shares... watching God's army literally BE His hands and feet has overwhelmed so many people!!! Those who are caring for him, his care team of doctor's, his representing agency, as well as many others are simply blown away by the outpouring of love for this sweet boy!</div>
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As I have said in every case like this that comes up; I am not representing any agency and I have limited information on each case. I DO spend SO much time researching and asking questions before I bring these situations to you;</div>
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Many of you are home study ready, approved for special needs, are ready to travel, and ready to pay, have inquired about this baby boy, but have not heard back from Children's Connections (baby boy's agency who asked for our help finding his family). I know how this feels and I'm so sorry! The response was overwhelming and while I can understand that part, the agency has asked me to take my post down while they sort through inquiries and narrow them down to the VERY BEST FAMILY for this boy. I'm more than happy to oblige.</div>
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PLEASE show grace and patience. PLEASE keep praying. And if you truly think you are HIS FAMILY, don't give up. Keep calling. Drive those people insane.... you'll never regret it! </div>
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And I'll be right behind you!</div>
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I'm thankful for each one of you; for your unconditional love, for your simple obedience, and for those fingers that click 'share' or type 'praying'... you are changing lives. </div>
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I can't wait to see what's next!!!</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-4767091000390132232017-02-17T12:26:00.000-05:002017-02-20T17:25:37.279-05:00Family Needed NOW for Special Needs Baby Girl!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This precious baby girl is currently<b> WITH HER FOREVER FAMILY</b>!!!!! Friends, this is entirely thanks to you..... to the 15,000+ of you who gave her story your time and read it.... to the 6,000+ of you who shared her story on Facebook, Instagram, and on your own blogs... and to the hundreds of thousands who simply saw her story and prayed....</div>
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to all of you, on behalf of this sweet baby girl, her First Family, her Forever Family, and those who have dedicated countless hours to seeing that they united as soon as possible...</div>
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<b><br /><span style="font-size: large;">THANK YOU.</span></b></div>
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<b>You always have been, are, and always will be HIS HANDS AND FEET for these precious little ones and you never cease to amaze me. </b></div>
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<b>** TIME IS RUNNING OUT... PLEASE PLEASE SHARE**</b></div>
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Girl's needs are extensive and much is unknown; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about her. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for her. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">A special family is desperately needed for a precious 6 week old Korean baby girl who suffered a traumatic birth. Baby Girl has been diagnosed with HIE (<a href="http://We%20are%20looking%20for%20a%20homestudy%20ready%20family%20for%20a%206%20week%20old%20baby%20girl%20who%20suffered%20a%20traumatic%20birth%20and%20has%20been%20diagnosed%20with%20HEI%20(Hypoxic%20Ischemic%20Encephalopathy).%20Her%20future%20is%20so%20unknown.%20We%20need%20to%20have%20a%20family%20in%20a%20East%20Coast%20state%20by%20Monday.%20We%20just%20started%20working%20with%20the%20hospital%20but%20the%20baby%20is%20ready%20to%20be%20released.%20She%20does%20have%20a%20feeding%20tube.%20ONLY%20homestudy%20ready%20families%20email%20sara@specialangelsadoption.org%20for%20more%20information./" target="_blank">Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy</a>). Baby Girl's future holds SO many unknowns, but one thing is FOR CERTAIN.... she needs a family... and quickly; She is being released MONDAY and will come home with a feeding tube.</span></b><br />
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<b>* Family MUST BE HOME STUDY READY</b><br />
<b>* Family MUST BE READY TO TRAVEL</b><br />
<b>* It is preferred that this family lives in an East Coast State to make travel and transport safe and fast</b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">This precious baby girl is in need of lifelong care, a family who will devote themselves to helping her reach her very highest potential, and who believe with everything in them that she does, in fact have enormous potential. Because she does.</span></b><br />
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<b>Fees are<u> $8,300 </u>and have already been reduced as much as possible. Fees include birth-mother counseling, ICPC, legals, and the work it takes to acquire adoption subsidies for the baby. Fees do not include finalization in the adoptive parent's home state or travel and travel expenses.</b></div>
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<b>If you would like to know more about bringing this precious girl into your family, please email your home study to Sara@SpecialAngelsAdoption.org .</b></div>
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<b>If this sweet girl isn't the right fit for your family right now, PLEASE click 'share' so we can continue searching for her forever family! They're out there... and I so strongly believe that we will find them! We are running out of time and I know how you guys work... if anyone can find this baby's family, it's YOU! </b></div>
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<b>Thank you for being HIS hands and feet on behalf of this most precious creation!</b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-84313159985747716522016-08-15T20:41:00.000-04:002016-08-15T20:41:02.278-04:00URGENT~ Family DESPERATELY Needed for Baby Boy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Boy's needs are extensive; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about her. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for her. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">A sweet, young family is desperately needed for a precious 4 month old, bi-racial baby boy who was born 2 months early. A traumatic delivery caused a brain bleed, which in turn caused <a href="http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/hydrocephalus/detail_hydrocephalus.htm" target="_blank">Hydrocephalus</a>. Baby Boy received a<a href="http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/neurology_neurosurgery/centers_clinics/cerebral-fluid/procedures/shunts.html" target="_blank"> shunt</a> soon after birth and shortly after receiving the shunt, he started having<a href="http://www.childneurologyfoundation.org/disorders/infantile-spasms/" target="_blank"> infant spasms.</a> These were caught quickly and they are being controlled by medication. Baby boy has movement in all of his limbs and opens his fingers, but doctor's suspect that he may have <a href="http://www.brainandspinalcord.org/spastic-quadriplegia/" target="_blank">Spastic Quad Cerebral Palsy</a> and there's a possibility that it could be severe. </span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">Sweet Boy's First Mama and Daddy would love to have an open relationship with their son's adoptive parents so they will also have the honor of watching their son grow. </span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "times";">This precious baby boy is in need of lifelong care, a family who will devote themselves to helping him reach his very highest potential, and who believe with everything in them that he does, in fact have enormous potential. Because he does.</span></b><br />
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<b>Fees are<u> $8,300 </u>and have already been reduced as much as possible. Fees include birth-mother counseling, ICPC, legals, and the work it takes to acquire adoption subsidies for the baby. Fees do not include finalization in the adoptive parent's home state, unless the family lives in Ohio). Fees also do not include travel and travel expenses.</b></div>
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<b>If you would like to know more about bringing this precious boy into your family, please email your home study to Sara@SpecialAngelsAdoption.org .</b></div>
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<b>If this sweet boy isn't the right fit for your family right now, PLEASE click 'share' so we can continue searching for his forever family! They're out there... and I so strongly believe that we will find them! </b></div>
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<b>Thank you for being HIS hands and feet on behalf of this most precious creation!</b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-45606051737852595092016-01-26T16:41:00.003-05:002016-01-26T17:35:02.025-05:00URGENT; Family Needed For Baby Girl<div style="text-align: center;">
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* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Girl's needs are extensive; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about her. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</div>
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* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</div>
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* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for her. Comments questioning issues around fees or First Parents will be deleted.</div>
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* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.</div>
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<b>A family is desperately needed for a precious 2 week old baby girl who was born in Florida with a cranial facial disorder and potential hearing loss. Baby girl's First Parents would like yearly visits.</b></div>
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<b>Fees are $28,000 and have already been reduced as much as possible. </b></div>
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<b>If you would like to know more about bringing this precious girl into your family, please email your home study to Sara@SpecialAngelsAdoption.org .</b></div>
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<b>If this sweet girl isn't the right fit for your family right now, PLEASE click 'share' so we can continue searching for her forever family! They're out there... and I so strongly believe that we will find them! </b></div>
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<b>Thank you for being HIS hands and feet on behalf of this most precious creation!</b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-41867122849543175162015-10-20T15:55:00.003-04:002015-10-21T21:48:10.538-04:00URGENT~ Baby Girl Needs Her Family!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b>* This is a SPECIAL NEEDS placement... I have done my best to start this research for you and have inked to all pertinent information within this post, however Baby Girl's needs are extensive; PLEASE do your own research before inquiring about her. Educate yourself... no one has time to do it for you ;-)</b></div>
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<b>* If you do not have a CURRENT, VALID HOME STUDY, are not approved for special needs, and are not ready to travel quickly, DO NOT APPLY for this situation.</b></div>
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<b>* I am not representing this baby or this situation... I am simply doing what I can do direct anyone who's heart is pulled at this baby's story to the one's who are caring for her.</b></div>
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<b>* The following is ALL of the information I have about this situation.</b></div>
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A home study ready, special needs approved family is needed for a precious 3 month old baby girl who has been diagnosed with <a href="http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/schizencephaly/schizencephaly.htm" target="_blank">P</a>rader Willi Syndrome (read more about <a href="http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/schizencephaly/schizencephaly.htm" target="_blank">P</a>rader Willi <a href="http://ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/prader-willi-syndrome" target="_blank">here</a><span id="goog_590845200"></span><span id="goog_590845201"></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/"></a>).</div>
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<b>A few things to know:</b></div>
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<b>* Baby Girl is presently on Oxygen and is in a specialized therapy facility to try and help her core improve to the point where she will not need a g-tube. A g-tube is still a possibility, but there is hope that therapy can strengthen her enough to not need it.</b></div>
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<b>* Fees will be, at most $13,000</b></div>
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<b>* Baby Girl's First Family would like an open adoption and would like to find a family for their baby girl who will love and keep her name (name will be told to prospective, home study approved families.... but it's SUPER cute!)</b></div>
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If you're ready to commit to this precious girl, or learn more about her, please email <b>Sara (at) specialangelsadoption (dot) org</b></div>
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If you're not in a place to welcome this sweet girl, please pray... for her incredible Mama and Daddy who love her so much and for her forever Mama and Daddy who are missing her, even if they don't know it yet.</div>
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<b>And please share. Her needs are extremely special... and her family has been through so much already in their quest to find her Forever Family... PLEASE share and help us unite them!</b></div>
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<b><a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2012/10/hunter-our-2-pound-13-ounce-miracle.html" target="_blank">Remember our Hunter</a>? He wasn't supposed to walk or talk or live. And he is. God is good... and when WE faithfully allow ourselves to be His hands and feet for these precious creations, HE SHOWS UP. Let's do this, friends... we're SO good at it!</b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-37562621807175358222015-09-24T20:18:00.002-04:002015-09-24T22:18:29.917-04:00The Girl on the Bridge<div style="text-align: center;">
It's not a story my husband would tell many people... but it's not one that's easily forgotten.</div>
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And in light of Suicide Awareness Month, he has given me permission to tell you what happened that day;</div>
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He wouldn't want to be called a hero or guardian angel...</div>
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but that's what he was...</div>
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When he saw the girl on the bridge.</div>
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He drives over the same bridge every day, never really giving a second thought to what lies below.</div>
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That Tuesday was the same...</div>
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but a few short seconds changed everything about that every-day-drive over that bridge from then on;</div>
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She was standing on the wrong side of the guard rail...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
a car was parked not far from her and a woman was standing on the sidewalk dozens of steps behind her...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
talking her down... begging her to turn around.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
If you know my husband, you know he's not one to interfere. This time was different. </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
It wasn't curiosity or nosiness... panic? fear?<br />
<br />
It doesn't matter... he turned his car around.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
He pulled into a nearby parking lot and walked across the bridge...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
the lady continued talking to the girl but said nothing to Joey as he passed her by; her phone was in her hand, signaling to Joey that the police were on their way...<br />
<br />
but how long had it been... and how long would it be?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
He walked slowly up behind the girl... realizing just now that she was probably 16 years old...<br />
<u><br /></u>
<u>maybe </u>16 years old?</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
As he approached the guard rail, he glanced over the side...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
80 feet down to a concrete sidewalk. Maybe more.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>She was going to die.</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
He guessed that she didn't know that he was behind her yet and as he walked closer, he silently and slowly reached over and placed his arm around her waist...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br />
a risky move, maybe... but if you know my husband, you also know that this young girl was safe the second he touched her.<br />
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
She was shaking uncontrollably. Paralyzed.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
"I'm not going to let you jump. You're safe. But I am going to pick you up."</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
And he did.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Up and over the guard rail... and as her body got closer to his, she melted...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
relief? </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I don't know. I hope so. I can only imagine.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
He tried to set her down so she could sit on the sidewalk but the best he could do was lay her against the street-side... the safe side... of the guard rail. She collapsed on the ground, head down... sobbing.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
The lady approached her and put her arm around the young girl...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>"You're ok. You're going to be ok."</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Joey stepped back.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
A police officer approached and nodded his thanks before Joey walked back to his car.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
As he pulled away, he could hear the ambulance sirens approaching in the distance...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
She would be ok....</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
for now. For today.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Joey came home early from work that afternoon and as he relayed the story to me, I could see in him the fear he felt for that young girl. I could sense the panic... but I could only imagine the emotions and thoughts running through his mind...<br />
<br />
about his own daughter. The 'why's'. The 'what if's'. </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
But I know my husband.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I know how safe his strong arm around your waist makes you feel...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I know that the sound of his deep voice is calming, even under the most stressful of situations...</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I know the control you feel when you can sense his presence standing next to you...<br />
<br />
I know that when he says something... "You're safe"... you believe him.<br />
<br />
What we don't know is what happened... what will happen... to that precious girl on the bridge.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I don't know what events took place in her life that morning... Who had she spoken to? Where had she been? Had no one tried to help her... Or had many? Where had her hurt come from? Where had her hopelessness come from?<br />
<br />
<br />
<i>What I do know is that depression puts you in places where you don't truly want to be... it changes parts of you that you once truly loved... it places blame where it doesn't belong...</i><br />
<br />
<br />
<i>and it robs you of what you've always known... what you've always believed.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><br /></i>
<i>And your control? There is none when depression takes the reigns. You... the 'you' you always knew, is gone.</i><br />
<br />
<br />
In the aftermath of losing our <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2013/08/such-bitter-sweetness-announcement.html" target="_blank">Precious</a> <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2013/08/such-bitter-sweetness-announcement.html" target="_blank">#</a><a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2013/08/such-bitter-sweetness-announcement.html" target="_blank">3</a>, I found myself in a dark place that I can only describe as the closest to Hell that I ever care to be. That I never cared to be.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
I was surrounded by people who loved me... my arms were full of the sweet babies that Jesus had given to me... and from the outside, my life was rich and busy and full of every blessing that some people never receive...<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
but where I was, was dark... and lonely... and empty... and scary...<br />
<br />
and as much as I wanted to be present and whole for the babies I did have...<br />
<br />
<i>I desperately wanted the one I had lost.</i><br />
<br />
And this is a hard reality for a Mama who became a Mama the way I did...<br />
<br />
and it's an even harder reality to admit out loud... or in writing.<br />
<br />
But also... aside from missing my baby...<br />
<br />
I had let my husband down... My body had. Over and over and over again...<br />
<br />
we had let him down.<br />
<br />
So guilt set in...<br />
<br />
<i>I missed the baby I lost when both of the precious ones I still had were standing right in front of me...</i><br />
<br />
<i>and how could my husband still love me... want me... when my body had failed him time and time again?</i><br />
<br />
And guilt led to shame...<br />
<br />
and shame led to feeling worthless...<br />
<br />
and worthlessness led to joylessness...<br />
<br />
and joylessness led to hopelessness...<br />
<br />
and that's where I was stuck.<br />
<br />
Where I was sinking.<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
Those closest to me worried about me... they did their very very best to be sure that I knew every second of every day that I was loved, that our Precious #3 wouldn't be forgotten, and that Jesus loved me.<br />
<br />
<i>Because if Jesus loves you, everything will be ok.</i><br />
<br />
My husband did everything he could to reassure me; he wasn't disappointed... he was sad... he was worried about me... he loved me.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
As the weeks and months went on, I felt that my depression became a nuisance to those who cared about me...<br />
<br />
In my mind, their faces told me to get over it.<br />
<br />
In my heart, I knew they wanted to help... but how?</div>
<div>
<br />
But their faces... that's all I could see. Their hearts were as lost to me as my own.<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
And one day, in a desperate attempt at helping me climb out of the dark place I was in, someone so precious to me... one of the most solid, encouraging, Godly women I know...<br />
<br />
<i>told me to "choose joy".</i><br />
<br />
And within those 2 words, the dark hole I was in became a bottomless pit that I knew I would never be able to climb out of on my own.<br />
<br />
I didn't see it coming.<br />
<br />
Those simple words screamed at me...<br />
<br />
"You can fix this if you'd just CHOOSE to be happy!"<br />
<br />
"You're the only one who can fix this... so fix it."<br />
<br />
And I couldn't.<br />
<br />
I was saved... I knew Jesus and how much He loved me... how much He sacrificed for me... how faithful He had been...<br />
<br />
I knew that if this... this Hell on Earth didn't work... if I never climbed out... if I couldn't find a way to live in it...<br />
<br />
<i>I would be in Heaven with my #3. </i><br />
<br />
I knew that.... and that's all I knew.<br />
<br />
The only place to go from there....<br />
<br />
is unspeakable.<br />
<br />
I couldn't choose joy... because I didn't have any to choose from. I was sad... and lost... and broken... and depressed...<br />
<br />
and society doesn't allow Christians to be depressed.</div>
<br />
<i>"Consider it pure joy when you face trials of any kind..." James 1:3-4</i><br />
<br />
<i>"Rejoice in the Lord, always!" Philippians 4:4</i><br />
<br />
<i>"This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24</i><br />
<br />
His Word screams it... demands it! CHOOSE JOY!<br />
<br />
<b><i>But friends, we make a huge mistake when we throw these verses at someone who has found themselves in the pit of depression.</i></b><br />
<br />
We mean well... and we love them... and often times we just don't know what else to say, so we assume that peace and healing can be found in these sacred words.<br />
<br />
In God's Word, joy is a common theme... as it should be! Those who know Him are gifted HIS joy...<br />
<br />
but those who know Him also know how to use His joy as a platform ...<br />
<br />
because what else can you do?!<br />
<br />
"Jesus can fix it," we say.<br />
<br />
Do you know someone in the throws of depression?! Do you know someone who is standing on that bridge?! Who is facing a bridge of their own?!<br />
<br />
They can't choose joy.<br />
<br />
They are sick.<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
Actually... they WISH they were sick. Because being sick means you have a diagnosis and having a diagnosis means there is hope... hope for a cure or for help or at the very least, for understanding.<br />
<br />
How do we help the girl on the bridge? How do we talk her down?<br />
<br />
The young woman, recently graduated, with so much in front of her... who just moved for her first job and doesn't know a soul.<br />
<br />
The newly married woman who desperately wants to have a baby... but her husband isn't ready.<br />
<br />
The couple who has been trying for months and can't get pregnant... but everyone around them is.<br />
<br />
The woman who got pregnant so easily and imagined incredible plans for her future with their first child... and lost her baby.<br />
<br />
The adoptive Mama who knows every single day how blessed she is that Jesus let her be a Mama... but stifles the deep desire within her to still experience pregnancy.<br />
<br />
The friend who's husband just walked out... making her a single mom.<br />
<br />
The ones who dreamt of retirement and years of enjoying each other... but her husband went first and way too early.<br />
<br />
They're there... they're here. They're you ... and they're me.<br />
<br />
This month... right now... I want you to know something...<br />
<br />
you cannot save her with Jesus.<br />
<br />
Yes, Jesus saves... yes, Jesus loves her... yes, Jesus has plans for her and hope for her future...<br />
<br />
Jesus does.<br />
<br />
Not you.<br />
<br />
Depression has a way of sucking every ounce of joy from a life that is otherwise joyful...<br />
<br />
it can steal your joy. Your happiness.<br />
<br />
And it will.<br />
<br />
But...<br />
<br />
it cannot steal your hope.<br />
<br />
<i>Joy; a feeling of great happiness</i><br />
<br />
<i>Hope; a feeling of expectation and desire</i><br />
<i>(dictionary.com)</i><br />
<br />
<br />
You can breathe HOPE into them.<br />
<br />
Because we can choose HOPE.... we can touch it and feel it...<br />
<br />
and as long as there is a future...<br />
<br />
there is hope.<br />
<br />
"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future."<br />
Jeremiah 29:11<br />
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: medium; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; orphans: auto; padding: 0px; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 1; word-spacing: 0px;">
</div>
<br />
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 1; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">"Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off."</span></div>
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: medium; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 1; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Proverbs 24:14</span></div>
<br />
"You will be secure because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety. You will lie down, with no one to make you afraid."<br />
Job 11; 18-19<br />
<br />
"The Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his love."<br />
Psalm 147:11<br />
<br />
That last one;<br />
<br />
<i>our hope... gives Him joy.</i><br />
<br />
Choosing hope forces us to look forward to what CAN BE.<br />
<br />
<i>While JOY makes us feel guilty for what is not.</i><br />
<br />
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."</i></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Romans 12:12</i></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That last one...</span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Rejoice in the fact that you have hope...</span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Be patient when things are hard...</span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And pray.... talk to Jesus.</span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When you're on the bridge and you're face to face with Hell... with the joy that you know you're called to have, but that you can't find even if it would save your life...</span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">friend, you can't choose joy.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>But you can choose hope.</i></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I lost my #3. In this life, I will never know him or her. </span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And there is no joy in that. There will never be ANY joy in that. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And I thought I would spend forever feeling guilty for the simple fact that I could not choose joy... like I was supposed to.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The charge to me to 'choose joy' pushed me to take a step that I was certain only proved that I was weak...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I made an appointment with a therapist.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">She listened to me... she questioned me... she made me cry and forced me to be honest... </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">and then she asked me...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">".. and what do you hope for?"</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And in those simple words, I realized that Jesus' plan for me is good.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It might hurt...and it might make me sad... and it might be everything I wished it wasn't...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">but beauty comes from ashes...</span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2014/07/4.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ynLy7eUE23w/VgSRiwNmeXI/AAAAAAAACcY/HOcxOS3_TaA/s320/10959336_10101793752298177_1586976822858759074_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">and from the ashes of some of the most terrible things we go through that are within His plan for us...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">comes hope.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Are you hurting? Are you the girl on the bridge... or the one who lost her baby... or her husband... or just her joy?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">There is hope. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The girl on the bridge... Is she your friend? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Show her what she CAN do... because there is so so much that she can't.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">She can dream... and she can talk to you... she can feel your strong arms around her and know that she is loved and she is safe...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">and she can hope.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">And it's not beyond me that this ending... this hope-filled ending... isn't always the outcome for those who are hurting;</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The girl on the bridge... I don't know where she is... or is she has found hope...</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Because I do know that beauty can come from ashes...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">and hope comes from hurt.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Let's be hope-givers.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">National Suicide Hotline; (800) 273-8255</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://psychcentral.com/find-help/" target="_blank">Find a therapist; http://psychcentral.com/find-help/</a></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-88639789677233693992015-09-16T16:16:00.001-04:002015-09-20T15:26:35.105-04:00He would be dead.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
He was 3 weeks old <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2012/10/hunter-our-2-pound-13-ounce-miracle.html?m=1" target="_blank">when we met him</a>... just a little over 3 pounds.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iFRgFIuE0qA/UINLfsYgQxI/AAAAAAAACPs/nrP5GYeEJD0/s320/IMG_1500.JPG" width="320" /></div>
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"Do you want to hold him?" She asked Joey...</div>
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"You'll be the first to hold him besides us..." </div>
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and as she handed him to Joey....</div>
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"He has such wise eyes... he looks right into your heart."</div>
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"He's been through so much... he's such a fighter...." </div>
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And she stood to the side as we got to know our new son.</div>
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In those 6 weeks, countless women and men loved on our tiny, precious boy...</div>
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they loved on us, too.</div>
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After spending a week 6 hours away from home, getting to know our son, Joey had to go back to work... </div>
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and most weekdays, I was alone;</div>
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My day would start and end at the Ronald McDonald House and every hour in between was spent with him... with them...</div>
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his first caregivers... some of the very first ones to love him... the first ones to pray over him... </div>
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the first ones to pray for us...</div>
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the first ones to acknowledge us as his Mommy and Daddy.</div>
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They were the first to hold him... change him... talk to him...</div>
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the first to teach us how to care for him...</div>
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for this precious, tiny miracle...</div>
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they never left our side.</div>
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They helped us keep our heads above water... juggling the time we knew we had with our sweet girl...</div>
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and the time we had with him... </div>
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not knowing how much of that time we had left.</div>
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As the weeks went by, we became family... I trusted them... and they trusted me.</div>
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I knew their stories...</div>
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and they were now part of mine.</div>
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The long shifts with short breaks... </div>
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I was there for hundreds of them.</div>
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Take a walk... eat... get some fresh air... call their mom or their husband or their friend... read... listen to music that might break up the deafening sound of beeping monitors and crying babies...</div>
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they could have... should have... done anything with those short breaks....</div>
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but most days, they would sit with me.</div>
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I had held him for hours... skin to skin... begging Jesus to save him, to give him strength, to equip us to be his Mama and Daddy... watching monitors religiously as they put numbers on his life... terrified that today might be my last day with him, while it was really only one of my first...</div>
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and they would sit with me... making the horrifying sounds disappear within the soft words of our conversation.</div>
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They gave me purpose...</div>
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and peace.</div>
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They gave me permission to love him... they placed him in my arms... </div>
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they made me his Mama.</div>
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The doctors blew me off because I wasn't his 'real' mom... and she fought for me.</div>
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He needed to gain 3 ounces in order to start bottle feeds... and she knew he was ready so she added .5 ounces to his midnight weigh-in.</div>
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He needed to eat 30 cc's in order to keep the ng-tube out and be able to go home... she let me sleep and didn't stop feeding him until he had eaten it all.</div>
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He coded... and she saved him.</div>
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But they weren't just there for him....</div>
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I was cold... so she brought me a warm blanket.</div>
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I didn't want to spend another night alone... so she arranged to let me room in with him.</div>
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I couldn't do it on my own anymore... she let me cry and told me I wasn't doing it alone; that she was there with me.</div>
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I needed Joey to get there in time for rounds, but he was 30 minutes away and rounds had already started... so she changed the attending's schedule.</div>
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She trusted my Mommy instinct... she trusted that I knew him best... she trusted that my heart knew him... even though he didn't come from my body. </div>
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The doctors told us he was going to die.... and none of them let him.</div>
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Lindsay.... Jackie.... Betsy.... Ellie.... Melissa.... Jennifer.... Rob.... and so many more.</div>
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They saved him.</div>
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I don't watch The View OR the Miss America Pageant...</div>
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I hate them both...</div>
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but since they're all clogging my news feed... and since so many of our friends and family have dedicated their lives to a profession as difficult as nursing...</div>
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this is the perfect opportunity for us to say "thank you" to every one of them...</div>
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but especially to the ones who saved our son.</div>
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And when this is your son... your precious miracle... your fighter...</div>
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the reality of who he is, of where he's been, of what could have been, and of where he is going...</div>
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is never very far from your mind.</div>
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And without them...</div>
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without his nurses...</div>
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he would be dead.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-61936673359642262522015-07-01T15:30:00.002-04:002015-07-02T14:22:26.647-04:00Droopy Eyelids, Small Kidneys, & Stiff Muscles... Parenting the Child With Special Needs<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Droopy eyelids, small kidneys, & stiff muscles.</i><br />
<br />
A *very* basic summary of the past few weeks in our house.<br />
<br />
There's a definite ebb and flow to life as the parent to a child who has special needs...<br />
<br />
it seems as if weeks and weeks go by when your *normal* is just that... normal... manageable....<br />
<br />
When the 'disorders' and 'delays' somehow disappear in the *normal* that is your day to day...<br />
<br />
your errands, and meal times, and play dates, and nap-times, and car-time sing-a-longs.<br />
<br />
And then the flow.<br />
<br />
The flow....<br />
<br />
is never a flow.<br />
<br />
It's more like a dam bursts....<br />
<br />
literally...<br />
<br />
One routine follow-up... one check-up... one meeting...<br />
<br />
it bursts your bubble of *normal* and throws off everything you *think* you know.<br />
<br />
Our ebb is over.<br />
<br />
<i>Hello flow.</i><br />
<br />
Three years old is tough, friends...<br />
<br />
in the world of every toddler, it's difficult... but in the world of a child who has special needs....<br />
<br />
it's a turning point.<br />
<br />
The past few weeks have been full of our *normal*, routine check-ups with various specialists (we have 17), a few new follow-ups, regular therapy sessions, as well as yearly evaluations, and pre-school testing and IEP meetings.<br />
<br />
Our flow.<br />
<br />
Hunter is a trooper... he works hard through every therapy session, patiently follows directions for whatever specialist is examining him, and keeps himself occupied while we discuss *findings* and *recommendations*.<br />
<br />
And those things... we discuss them as if he's not there... as if he's not listening and comprehending.<br />
<br />
As if.<br />
<br />
Lately, my head spends most of the day analyzing and dissecting my son's movements and actions and sounds... It's impossible not to let the words of his team of professionals slither their way in to our *normal*....<br />
<br />
and interrupt our ebb.<br />
<br />
So we flow...<br />
<br />
my mind flows daily... and nightly, too... my anxiety is high as I anticipate the next meeting or evaluation, the next appointment or set of labs....<br />
<br />
it's all consuming, this flow.<br />
<br />
And it's so easy to think that this... this flow... is only affecting us... mommy and daddy. We're the ones who understand the implications of every diagnosis and ever recommendation... we're the ones who handle the follow ups and make arrangements for the other kids who can't come to certain appointments... we're the ones who consider what the future looks like for him and for our family while we juggle the necessary therapies and schedules to make sure he is receiving every possible resource that's available to him.<br />
<br />
The flow.<br />
<br />
A few weeks ago we posted a private plea for prayer on our personal Facebook pages... we were feeling desperate as we awaited lab results that would tell us if our son was in the middle stages of kidney failure. All labs we had received at that time led us to believe that his one healthy, growing kidney was failing... and when you have one kidney and that kidney fails...<br />
<br />
the flow.<br />
<br />
A few days later, Hunter was released from Physical Therapy for a much-deserved break... until the Fall when it will be necessary to cast his legs in order to break some bad habits he has developed that are causing his muscles to tighten...<br />
<br />
the flow.<br />
<br />
Two days later we sat in his Opthamologists office and heard about how his vision is excellent.... except that his moderate far-sightedness and his droopy eyelids will needs to be addressed at some time in the future...<br />
<br />
the flow.<br />
<br />
And then his IEP meetings with the special school district. Hunter was amazing through 3 hours of 'play' which being observed by a team of 6... OT's, SLP's, child psychologists, PT's, and special needs teachers who would ultimately determine the level of his developmental, speech, and physical delays in order to determine what resources he qualifies for in next year's pre-school program...<br />
<br />
the flow.<br />
<br />
In all of these meetings and evals and appointments, Hunter plays and listens and does what he's asked and does it all with such an amazing attitude.<br />
<br />
He's 3.... so this flow.... he's not aware of it...<br />
<br />
he can't be.<br />
<br />
He's 3.<br />
<br />
Hearing loss, Global Developmental Delays, operates on a 15-24 month level, non-verbal...<br />
<br />
he can't understand... can't know...<br />
<br />
Right?!<br />
<br />
While Joey makes it to every appointment he can, this ebb and flow of appointments and diagnoses and testing is 'our thing'... mine and Hunter's. We do it all together... every time. We do it all together and I carry it all on my shoulders... that's my job... my privilege. And it's not easy... but it's an honor to be 'that' for him.<br />
<br />
A few nights ago, the kids had been in bed for almost 2 hours... the house was quiet....<br />
<br />
and then I heard Hunter cry...<br />
<br />
it was his sad cry.<br />
<br />
Do you know the one?<br />
<br />
The one that starts as a sob and slowly turns into a sound that rips your heart at the seams ...<br />
<br />
it isn't angry... or manipulative... or hungry... or 'wet'.....<br />
<br />
it's so sad.<br />
<br />
Before I could even respond, Joey went upstairs and held him for a while... he loves that time with his babies... he rocked him, sang to him...<br />
<br />
"Are you ready to lay back down and go ni-night?'<br />
<br />
"Yeah", he said.<br />
<br />
Joey went to the gym shortly after and again the house was quiet...<br />
<br />
the flow.<br />
<br />
His cry was worse... it was high-pitch and gut-wrenching.<br />
<br />
It was my turn....<br />
<br />
and As I walked upstairs, 'slightly' annoyed that my 'job' was not yet done for the day... 'slightly' irritated that someone needed me, yet again... and more than slightly angry that Joey had gone to the gym when he did (even though he more than deserved his time!)... my irritation grew as I climbed the stairs to his room and I was prepared to pat his butt a few times, tell him he's ok and that I would see him in the morning, "I love you, goodnight".<br />
<br />
He was standing in his crib when I opened the door and his arms went out for me immediately...<br />
<br />
"Ok fine", I thought... "Just for a minute."<br />
<br />
I picked him up and he clung to me as if his life depended on my strength and solitude to save him... to sustain him.<br />
<br />
His sobs shook me to my core...<br />
<br />
this wasn't sadness...<br />
<br />
this was defeat.<br />
<br />
My precious 3 year old... the one who recently consumed my every thought, whom I have lost so much sleep over, who's future I worry about daily, whom I invest so much of my time and energy into, the one who I carry all of this for....<br />
<br />
the one whom I thought I had been feeling all of these feelings FOR over the past few weeks...<br />
<br />
He was defeated, too.<br />
<br />
And as I held him, the flow flooded over me...<br />
<br />
Droopy eyelids, small kidneys, stiff muscles, casts, blood work, talking devices, 15-24 months, and on and on and on...<br />
<br />
he had heard it all... he had felt it all...<br />
<br />
and he was done.<br />
<br />
He was drowning in the flow.<br />
<br />
And so I layed down with him on my chest and I rubbed his back...<br />
<br />
I cried as I did my best to speak life back into him...<br />
<br />
"Hunter, you are strong."<br />
<br />
"You are brave."<br />
<br />
"Your life matters."<br />
<br />
"You are so loved."<br />
<br />
"You are not alone... you'll never be alone."<br />
<br />
"We do this together, baby boy."<br />
<br />
"We'll always do this together."<br />
<br />
And I prayed over him...<br />
<br />
"Thank you for Hunter's joy... for his life... thank you for choosing him for me. Jesus, he is so strong... please keep him strong. He is so brave and some of our days are so hard... please protect his spirit. Let Hunter feel you. Amen."<br />
<br />
We sang 'his' song and I laid him back down...<br />
<br />
he grabbed his blanky, rolled over, and went to sleep.<br />
<br />
Some of our days are really hard... and it's easy for me to get caught up in dividing my time between all of my babies, managing invoices and bills, scheduling appointments, reminding children to use the words they know, trying to understand cues from those who don't have spoken words, making our days fun and playful, practicing patience, and finding time for myself and my marriage...<br />
<br />
there are days when finding a balance is almost impossible...<br />
<br />
And it's so easy to make these things about me....About keeping myself afloat in our flow.<br />
<br />
My son reminded me in the most precious way that he knows... he feels... he hears (a miracle for this boy!)... he understands...<br />
<br />
And he reminded me that we all need those words... affirmative, life-speaking words that sustain us and keep us going when that sad cry threatens to break through...<br />
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and I'm thankful for the sad cry that allowed me to speak life back into him...<br />
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because of the One who breathed life into us both.<br />
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<b><span style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; font-family: Trebuchet, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 20px; text-align: justify;">Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them."</span><span class="p" style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; font-family: Trebuchet, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 13px; text-align: justify;"><br /></span></b><br />
<span style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; font-family: Trebuchet, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 20px; text-align: justify;"><b>John 7:38</b></span><br />
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Another thing....<br />
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Hunter's kidney is strong... in fact, it's perfect.<br />
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And God is so so good!<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-28415021153214165052015-05-17T16:54:00.001-04:002015-05-17T17:11:30.158-04:00On Christ The Solid Rock I'll Stand!<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><b>My hope is built on nothing less,</b></i></div>
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<i><b>Than Jesus' blood and righteousness;</b></i></div>
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<i><b>I dare not trust the sweetest frame,</b></i></div>
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<i><b>But wholly lean on Jesus' name!</b></i></div>
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<i><b>On Christ the solid rock I stand,</b></i></div>
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<i><b>All other ground is sinking sand...</b></i></div>
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<i><b>All other ground is sinking sand.</b></i></div>
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Did we tell you that we're building a house?!</div>
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It's a dream come true!</div>
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When Joey and I first started dreaming of building a house for our family, I knew I wanted it to be covered in His Word. I wanted its' walls to scream His name... the floors to echo His Word... and our rooms to be surrounded in His promises.</div>
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Friday night is a night I will never forget! As I walked through each room, writing scripture on the walls of our home, I prayed over each room, each precious baby that will sleep or play or eat or bathe in those rooms, for every argument and for every moment that will define our marriage and our family, for every friend who will walk through our doors.... I asked Jesus to protect them, keep them healthy, bring our babies to Him when they are young, and guide us as we love them through so many hard things... And so many exciting things. </div>
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Our walls will be nailed in place tomorrow and as they are, Hannah's Daddy's writing will echo in her new room that 'The Lord is with her, and she will not fail (psalm 46:5)', that 'She is more precious than jewels (proverbs 3:15)'...My prayer will be on our boys' walls that 'Our sons will walk beside the Lord, on a straight path in which they will not stumble (Jer 31;96)'... God's promise will be seen on our master bedroom walls that 'What God has joined together, no man will separate (Matthew 19:6)'... Hannah's precious handwriting will echo the long-cried prayer of our hearts, 'For this child, I have prayed! (1 Samuel 1:27)'... Visitors will walk under Hebrews 13:2 and will feel our love and hospitality because one never knows when they are entertaining Angels.... And those who walk through our front door will enter into the covenant we made when we said 'I do' almost 10 years ago.... 'As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord! (Joshua 24:14)' I can't wait to walk through those doors in a couple months, knowing that our home and our family will be surrounded by His promises!</div>
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As we walked away from our home... only hours before crews would arrive to dry wall over the verses that will surround us for the next 20+ years, I posted the above on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/OnLoanFromHeaven" target="_blank">Facebook page</a>...</div>
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the response to that short post has been overwhelming and SO many of you have asked for a list of the verses we chose for our new home...</div>
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And I am more than happy to share :-)</div>
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Each person received a sharpie and a printout of all of the verses we wanted in our home (even Hannah!).... some of the verses are written over and over again on the framing of the house, in various handwriting!</div>
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<u><i><b><span style="font-size: large;">On the pillar to our front porch;</span></b></i></u></div>
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<b>Joshua 24:14</b></div>
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'But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!'</div>
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<b><u><i><span style="font-size: large;">In our main living spaces, we wrote;</span></i></u></b></div>
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<b>2 Corinthians 5:1</b></div>
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'For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in Heaven, not build by human hands.'</div>
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<b>Micah 6:8</b></div>
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'Act justly, love mercy, walk humbly.'</div>
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<b>Proverbs 24: 3-4</b></div>
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'By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it's established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with precious and pleasant riches!'</div>
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<b>1 Samuel 25:6</b></div>
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'Say to him, "Long life to you! Good health to you and your household! And good health to all that is yours!"</div>
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<b>1 Kings 8:13</b></div>
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'I have indeed built a magnificent home for you, a place for you to dwell forever!'</div>
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<b>Deuteronomy 28:6</b></div>
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'You will be blessed when you come in and blessed when you go out.'</div>
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<u><b><i><span style="font-size: large;">In our entry way;</span></i></b></u></div>
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<b>Hebrews 13:2</b></div>
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'Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing so some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it!'</div>
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<u><i><b><span style="font-size: large;">In our master bedroom;</span></b></i></u></div>
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<b>Matthew 19:6</b></div>
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'What God has joined together, let no man separate.'</div>
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<b>1 Thessalonians 5:11</b></div>
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'Encourage one another and build each other up.'</div>
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<b>1 Peter 4:8</b></div>
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'Above all things have intense and unfailing love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins.'</div>
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<b><i><u><span style="font-size: large;">In Hannah's room;</span></u></i></b></div>
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<b><i><u><br /></u></i></b></div>
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<b>Proverbs 31:25</b></div>
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'She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future!'</div>
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<b>Psalm 46:5</b></div>
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'The Lord is with her, she will not fail!'</div>
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<b>Proverbs 3:15</b></div>
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'She is more precious than jewels!'</div>
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<b><i><u><span style="font-size: large;">In the boys' rooms;</span></u></i></b></div>
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<b><i><u><br /></u></i></b></div>
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<b>Jeremiah 31:96</b></div>
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'May our sons walk beside the Lord, on a straight path in which they will not stumble.'</div>
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<b>Psalm 127:3</b></div>
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'Sons are a heritage of the Lord.'</div>
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<b><i><u><span style="font-size: large;">In all of the kids' rooms and bathroom;</span></u></i></b></div>
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<b>John 1:12</b></div>
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'I am a child of God!'</div>
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<b>1 Samuel 1:27</b></div>
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'For this child I have prayed!'</div>
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<b>1 Timothy 4:12</b></div>
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'Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity.'</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-28146015329318955752015-05-07T10:00:00.000-04:002015-05-07T10:32:15.331-04:00Mother's Day is for First Mom's, too!<div style="text-align: center;">
Mother's Day is just around the corner and if you're like me....</div>
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you've done nothing to prepare :-/</div>
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If your family has grown through adoption, I am begging you not to forget the First Mom's in your life.... not only does she deserve to be recognized on one of the most profoundly difficult days of the year for her... but your child NEEDS to see you acknowledge and love his/her First Mama, too!</div>
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Every year I try to find a few gift ideas the I think any First Mom would LOVE! Here are 2 super simple, inexpensive, and more than meaningful gift ideas for the First Mama in your life.... pick one and do it... you will never regret doing it, but one day you might regret it if you don't.<br />
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And please, if your precious gift is late, it's ok! Do it anyway.<br />
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(**I am not a representative for any of the companies below... I do not get anything from them for posting these links... I love their products and think they make amazing First Mom gifts**)<br />
<a href="http://photos.walmart.com/walmart/loggedoutproductpage/prdname=canvas-wall-art-canvasprint-witheasel-4x6/prd=dpa/prdtype=8153/isfrom=_xffwalmart_xffrevieworderstore" target="_blank"><br /></a>
<a href="http://photos.walmart.com/walmart/loggedoutproductpage/prdname=canvas-wall-art-canvasprint-witheasel-4x6/prd=dpa/prdtype=8153/isfrom=_xffwalmart_xffrevieworderstore" target="_blank"><b>Canvas photo and easel (</b></a>this is what our First Moms will get from Hannah and Hunter this year (sorry ladies, I ruined the surprise ;-))... and me.... cause I ordered extras ;-));<br />
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$11.96<br />
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<a href="http://photos.walmart.com/walmart/loggedoutproductpage/prdname=canvas-wall-art-canvasprint-witheasel-4x6/prd=dpa/prdtype=8153/isfrom=_xffwalmart_xffrevieworderstore" target="_blank"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhei80jLF-kZq0G0ju9WWQfBxRrTAHSMKP057YdXtV1rqmfH5uo0Bu2TGdDjG1zHBB5zRNtKKzAcvrJt2XS7VKxtZQHB73uhtHu9bp1caHrG4ar6IMHACsPPAthT_zpWBYEqwdQBuqaDL8C/s320/8153_img1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://simpleaddiction.com/index.php?route=product/product&path=453_440&product_id=1293" target="_blank"><b><br /></b></a>
<a href="http://simpleaddiction.com/index.php?route=product/product&path=453_440&product_id=1293" target="_blank"><b>Bangle Charm Bracelets; </b></a>these are so beautiful and the charms represent so many different moments in your First Mom and child's life!<br />
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$5.95<br />
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Don't like my ideas? Fine. :-) Send some flowers... who doesn't love flowers?!<br />
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Which one did you order?! She's going to love it!<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-12350588289078800652015-05-06T21:12:00.001-04:002015-05-06T21:20:59.772-04:00First.<div>
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<b>First.</b><br />
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<i>(dictionary.com) coming before all others in time or order; earliest; 1st</i></div>
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The most coveted position one can hold... in a job or a contest.</div>
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It's what happens 'before'... the beginning.</div>
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What has to happen... in order for anything else to happen.</div>
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<b>First.</b></div>
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My babies have First Moms.</div>
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Women who's position I will never be able to fill.</div>
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Women who came before me.</div>
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Women who had to be first... so I could be next.</div>
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<b>They were First.</b></div>
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I have referred to my babies' 'birth moms' as their 'First Moms' since the birth of this blog....</div>
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I am not, and will never be, a 'birth mom', but that term has always hurt my heart for those who hold it's title...</div>
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but it didn't occur to me until recently that maybe 'First Mom' hurts them, too?</div>
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Because at the end of the day, who wants their name to have a qualifier?!</div>
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But this one.... 'First Mom'... it's so special to me. It comes from a place in my heart that uses the term *almost* reverently...</div>
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because my babies First Moms?!</div>
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<i>They did not just give birth.</i></div>
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The first people on the face of the Earth who knew about our precious babies' existence...</div>
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the first one's who loved them...</div>
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the first one's who cared for them and sacrificed for them...</div>
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<b>they were first.</b></div>
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They chose life... they sustained life... they changed their life for those precious lives... </div>
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they were our babies' Moms... First.</div>
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In today's society, 'First' is something we desire in our daily lives... being the first one in line, the first to be promoted, the first to the finish line, the first to order...</div>
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Please hear me...</div>
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I didn't carry 2 of my precious babies... I didn't see those 2 pink lines.... I didn't hear their heartbeats.... I didn't feel them move inside of me... I didn't struggle to bring them into the world or hear their first cry... I didn't witness their first breath and I wasn't the first to hold them....</div>
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but I will never spend one minute wishing that I had been first.</div>
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There are 2 women in this world who came first.... and they deserve to be first. </div>
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Those memories? Theirs. The feelings? Theirs. The moments? Theirs.</div>
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And I can't imagine any 2 women who are more deserving of those memories and feelings and moments....</div>
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My babies have First Moms, not birth moms...</div>
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Because they came first.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-50346312750512240082015-04-30T09:42:00.001-04:002015-04-30T09:44:27.335-04:00First Mama's and Adoptive Parents... <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2015/04/birthmom-buds-opportunity-to-serve.html"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4TCRvm0ZkfM/VR2JTUqvCuI/AAAAAAAACUM/rQkBr0NdhS8/s1600/BMBHeader2.bmp" /></a><span id="goog_1435941804"></span><span id="goog_1435941805"></span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/"></a></div>
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This weekend, I have the HUGE honor of speaking to an amazing group of First Mamas at the <a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2015/04/birthmom-buds-opportunity-to-serve.html">BirthMom Buds Retreat! </a>I am SO excited for this opportunity and my prayer is that Jesus allows me to speak truth and encouragement into their lives... </div>
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And I could use your help :-)</div>
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<b>Are you a First Mama?</b></div>
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What do you need to hear from your baby's adoptive mama? If you could sit down with her, what would you ask her? What words, if there are any, would make your heart happy? What do you want HER to know?</div>
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<b>Or maybe you're an adoptive parent...</b></div>
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What do you want your baby's First Mama to know?! When you look at that precious face every day, do you think about her? What do you need her to hear from YOUR mama heart?</div>
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Please help me, friends... share your heart with me... tell me the most precious words that maybe you can't even say! <i>I want your feedback so badly, no matter what phase of life you're in so everyone who gives me feedback will be entered to win a fun giveaway from me :-)</i></div>
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Leave a comment below, on<a href="https://www.facebook.com/OnLoanFromHeaven"> Facebook</a>, or email me (OnLoanFromHeaven at yahoo dot com)... I can't wait to share with you after this weekend!</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-62806009990737337942015-04-02T14:42:00.000-04:002015-04-02T14:47:31.961-04:00BirthMom Buds... Opportunity to Serve!<div style="text-align: center;">
Have you heard of <a href="http://birthmombuds.com/">BirthMom Buds</a>?</div>
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If you haven't, go check them out...</div>
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<a href="http://birthmombuds.com/">Here...</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/birthmombuds?fref=ts">or here...</a></div>
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I'll wait...</div>
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:-)</div>
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BirthMom Buds is an amazing group of Birth Moms who have joined together to support and encourage each other and also provide support to expecting moms who may be considering adoption for their baby....</div>
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And as an adoptive mama, I've learned SO much from them over the years!</div>
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This group has grown leaps and bounds over the past few years and they host an incredible retreat annually for First Moms of all backgrounds... some who placed years and years ago and some who placed within the past few months... some who are part of an open adoption and some who are part of a closed one... some who have reunited with their babies and some who have not. For 3 days, these women come together in Charlotte, North Carolina and spend time in a haven that is build specifically for them... for their hearts and minds and souls. </div>
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Can you imagine a better place for your babies' First Mama to be?!</div>
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I can't.</div>
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I am MORE than honored that the staff of BirthMom Buds have asked me to speak at <a href="http://birthmombuds.com/support/annual-retreat/">this year's retreat</a>! A chance to stand in front of women who are so much like my babies' and brother's First Moms is the chance of lifetime and I can't wait to pour love and encouragement into them in May!</div>
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But here's the best part about this retreat...</div>
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2 nights in a hotel... amazing food... fun games... a special goodie bag for each Mama... </div>
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and it's free of cost to every Mama who attends.</div>
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Free.</div>
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The staff of Birth Mom Buds relies completely on donations to host this special weekend for these Mamas... and they could use our help!</div>
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The cost incurred for each woman's attendance for 3 days is approximately $70... and so far, over 35 women have committed to attending! (SO EXCITING!!)</div>
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If you've been looking for a way to serve some First Mama's, <a href="http://www.gofundme.com/bmbretreat">please consider heading over to their support page and making a donation</a>! They need at least $2,450 to come in over the next few weeks so they can make this the most memorable weekend for their girls!</div>
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And if it's just not a good time to donate monetarily, that's ok! They also need a few more things from us...</div>
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<b>* Each First Mama who attends this retreat will go home with a special goodie bag! If you own or run your own business, please consider donating 40 items to these bags! Businesses will be mentioned by name in the retreat program and I can't think of a better way to make these ladies feel special and loved by so many people!</b></div>
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<b>* There will be dozens of contests and giveaways throughout the weekend and the staff of BMB needs door prizes of any and all shapes, sizes, and colors! I'll be donating some of my favorite essential oils :-) Do you have something sitting around that you could donate?! Or how fun would a gift card be??</b></div>
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If you're led to donate goodie bag items or door prizes, those both need to be received by April 28 and you can contact Nicole Strickland at <b>BirthMomBuds@gmail.com</b>! (And she's awesome... you'll love her :-))</div>
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And if nothing else, please be in prayer for this special weekend... that these Mama's would feel special and loved, that the staff would be refreshed and equipped to support them, that hurting hearts will be healed and that lifelong friendships would be made! Pray that God gives me the words that these Mama's need to hear from an adoptive Mama... that they would resonate deeply and bring healing where it's needed.</div>
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Thanks, friends... If I know anything about you, it's that you are the best at allowing God to use you to change lives... and I've seen you change SO many! Thank you for being His hands and feet!</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2987958311213810613.post-60911571691589062392015-03-24T22:47:00.000-04:002015-03-24T23:11:37.687-04:00Not just another day.... <div style="text-align: center;">
The pain of losing our precious #3 will always be fresh ... it will always hurt... and we will always miss him/her. </div>
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People say that the pain lessens....</div>
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I just don't think so.</div>
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And I don't want it to.... I will hold on to whatever tiny pieces of that baby for as long as I live... it's all I have.</div>
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Our #3's due date will forever be a day on our calendar that brings me so much pain... and also so much hope.<br />
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Because we will see our #3 again.<br />
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Losing our #3 was a process... he/she just didn't want to let go... I bled for weeks but ultra-sound after ultra-sound would show that tiny, faintly fluttering heart beat...</div>
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the one that never got stronger.</div>
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And then it stopped.</div>
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I'll never forget 'that' ultra-sound... my world collapsed. </div>
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We had never even HOPED to experience a home-grown baby...</div>
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and then this precious baby we had never even allowed ourselves to hope for was being ripped from our grasp.</div>
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Tomorrow is our #3's second due-date-birthday... </div>
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<a href="http://www.onloanfromheaven.com/2014/04/jesus-told-me-mommy_1.html" target="_blank">And do you remember what is so amazing about that day?!</a></div>
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It's the day we conceived our #3...</div>
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our precious Abe.</div>
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Our #4.<br />
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Tomorrow will hurt... it will be full of painful memories and tears and 'what ifs' and 'should have beens'... but it will also be full of the babies Jesus let me keep here with me... the ones he gave me to hold...<br />
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the ones that are simply On Loan From Heaven....<br />
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until we can all be together again.<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0